If your friend or relative is grieving, you may find it difficult to console him or her. But don’t give up yet. While you can’t take the pain away, your presence is important. Accept the fact that you can’t fix the situation or make your friend or relative feel better. It’s important to just be present and offer hope and a positive outlook. Grieving will be a gradual process.

Sometimes, you may not know what to say to a bereaved person. You may try some of the steps mentioned below:

1. It is alright to mention the deceased. It won’t make your friend any sadder, though it may prompt tears. (This suggestion does not apply in cultures in which mentioning the dead is taboo or bad luck, however.)
2. Offer hope. People who have gone through grieving tend remember that it is the person who offered hope that things will get better, who helped gradually move from pain to a renewed sense of life.
3. Make calls. Call to express your sympathy. Try to avoid phrases like "It’s God’s will" or "It’s for the best" unless the bereaved person says this first. The person may need you even more after the first few weeks and months, when other people usually stop calling.
4. Write a note. If you had a relationship with the deceased, include a warm, caring, or funny anecdote showing how important to you he or she was. If that’s not the case, offer your sympathy and assure the bereaved that he or she is in your thoughts or prayers.
5. Help out. Be specific when you offer help. Volunteer to shop or do laundry, bring dinner, etc. A lawyer may volunteer to help with the estate.
6. Be sensitive to differences. People mourn and grieve in different ways. Religion plays a vital role in how death is treated.It is advisable to do ethnic, cultural, and family backgrounds. Do not to impose your beliefs about death on your friend.
7. Make a date. Ask your friend to join you for a walk or a meal once a week. Weekends are often very difficult; suggest an activity. Watch a video at home together. Just being there without saying much may also help sometimes.
8. Listen well. Lend a sympathetic ear is a wonderful thing. Don’t offer advice unless you are asked to do so.
9. Express your feelings. If you share your friend’s sorrow, express that. (Do not express your feelings so emphatically that your friend has to take care of you)
10. Handle anger gently. People who are grieving may sometimes direct angry feelings toward the closest target. If that happens to be you, try to be understanding.
11. Keep your promises. If you offer to do anything, follow through.

[Harvard]